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"Rituals are just made-up holidays that we repeat on purpose."

Hey Reader,

Before I get into the newsletter, just a reminder: Last chance to enter The $1500 Wine🍷 Weekend Getaway! Just screenshot your download of my Audible Original The Buddy System and reply here with the pic! I will announce the winner in next week's newsletter.

So one of you is getting a very fun surprise next week!
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Around this time of year, most newsletters start sounding the same.
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“Be grateful.”
“Spend time with loved ones.”
“Remember what matters.”​
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So, as a thank you for being here, I want to give you something more personal. Something that has actually worked in my real life to build the friendships I rely on today.

It’s the story of a tradition that began with too much steak, evolved into a trophy, and became my clearest proof that friendship thrives when we create rituals on purpose.

👥 THE FRIEND

The 22-year ritual that made me who I am

Twenty-two years ago, my friends and I created a tradition.

The Tuesday before Thanksgiving. Peter Luger. Steak with the boys.

It didn't become what it is right away. It took a couple of years before we even named it "Man of the Year." A couple years after that, someone introduced a trophy.

And that’s when things started to get interesting.

We weren’t just catching up, we were competing for “Man of the Year.”
We were sharing the highs, the lows, the wins, the losses.
We were pushing for a friend to win (and occasionally sabotaging each other...lovingly, of course)
We were not so secretly structuring our year around having something epic to bring to the table.

(Yes, I genuinely wanted to grow my family this year again…
but a tiny part of me did think, “this baby could get me votes.”) (it didn't - but that's a whole different story)

It was a silly tradition created by a bunch of guys in our twenties eating way too much steak and thick-cut bacon.

Now?
We’re in our forties. Less hair. Less thick-cut bacon. More brussels sprouts.
But the spirit is the same:

Celebrating each other. Being present. And taking the guesswork out of friendship.

And by that I mean, We know where we’ll be forty years from now:
God willing, still at Peter Luger, the Tuesday before Thanksgiving.

Because traditions aren’t accidents. They’re choices.

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Rituals are just made-up holidays that we repeat on purpose.​
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🛠️ THE FIX

You don’t need a steakhouse or a trophy.

Just pick one friend and tell them this: in person, on the phone, or even in a text.

“If I had a trophy to give a friend for my life this year, it would go to you.

Here’s why:

You showed up for me when _____________.
You made my life lighter by ______________.
I want us to do more __________ next year.”

Pick whatever is real to you.

If you do nothing else this week, do that.

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📚 THE RECO

Pick ONE of these questions for your table

I know it feels uncomfortable to make an ask of people at your table, but just know that everyone will appreciate it.
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(Printed cards always hit harder- but it's fine if you just say it)

1. “What’s something someone at this table did this year that made your life better?”
2. “What’s one moment from this year when you felt truly supported by a friend?”
3. “What’s something you want to do with someone at this table in 2026?”

One question. That's all it takes for the room to feel more connected and the holiday to feel more meaningful.
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Now for the cliche: I wish you all health, happiness, and friendship this Thanksgiving. I’m blessed with a loving wife, beautiful children, an incredible circle of family and friends, and a purpose. That’s all I need.
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Until next time,
​Matt Ritter
The Friendship Guy

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