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"Every habit you have is a chance to strengthen a friendship."

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Hey Reader,
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Every morning, I take an ice-cold shower while rattling off my gratitude list out loud. Yeah, I know it’s ridiculous. I’m half-frozen, mumbling “my wife, my kids, my newsletter readers…” like a lunatic auditioning for a gratitude cult.

After doing it for about a year, it finally hit me. It’s not the cold shower that wakes me up. It’s the daily reminder that happiness isn’t about intensity; it’s about consistency. The same faces, the same names, the same love, over and over again. That’s what keeps you grounded.

That’s why I’m so excited to share this: My Audible Original The Buddy System drops October 23rd. A funny, heartfelt guide to modern friendship that I co-wrote with my best friend and podcast co-host, Aaron Karo.

It’s about how to actually do adult friendship in the middle of real life: when you’ve got kids, work, and a calendar that never seems to stop. How to reconnect with the people who matter, and stop letting the ones who do slip away.

If this newsletter has ever made you think differently about your friends, I’d love it if you’d add it to your Audible library right now so it’s ready for launch day.
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​🎧 Add The Buddy System to your Audible library.​

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Now, let’s talk about something that’s been helping me lately:
the idea that friendship can fit in almost anywhere.

🧑‍🤝‍🧑 The Friend: James Clear

Shout out to one of my all-time favorite authors and an inspiration for this newsletter, someone I genuinely admire: James Clear. When James Clear wrote Atomic Habits, he taught us how to build habits that last...and one of his best ideas was habit stacking.
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Simply put: Attach a new habit to one you already do.
Brush teeth. Add floss. Pour coffee. Journal.

All due respect to James Clear, here’s my upgrade: stack people.

I don't mean a weird jenga party, I mean adding a person to that formula.
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You’ll skip the gym for yourself, but not when your buddy’s waiting.
You’ll bail on the walk, unless someone’s grabbing the coffees.
You’ll forget the gratitude list, unless you’re texting it to your friend right after.

Habits change behavior.
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Friends change your life.
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It’s not just about what you repeat, it’s about who repeats it with you.

🛠️ The Fix: Stack a Friend Onto a Habit

This week, don’t start a new habit. Just add a friend to one you already have. Unless you're a nail-biter like me, don't bring anyone into that nightmare.

Try one:

• Workout stack: Text a friend before your next run or class. Accountability beats motivation every time.
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• Coffee stack: Turn one morning into a standing Friendship Friday. One slot, rotating friend.
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• Errand stack: Trader Joe’s run + call a buddy = groceries + dopamine.

Every habit you already have is a chance to strengthen a friendship. No extra time required.

🎧 The Reco: The Buddy System (Audible Original)

While you’re at it, stack The Buddy System into your Audible library... right alongside whatever else you’re listening to. After all, it’s the same idea: add a little friendship to what you’re already doing.

How could I not make it this?
By now, hopefully you know me a bit. I’m doing this for the community, because I know it’ll help.

The Buddy System is part comedy, part modern self-help, part heart-to-heart.
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It’s about why adult friendship gets so hard and how to fix it. How to make new friends, keep the old ones, and stop feeling like you’re “too busy” for the people who matter most.

It’s packed with stories, laughter, and simple, real-life steps for anyone who wants to build a better friendship life, not just think about it.

If you’re an Audible member, it’s free.​
And if you’re not, there’s a free trial...so there’s literally no downside.

​🎧 Add The Buddy System to your Audible library today, it drops October 23rd.

I appreciate each and every one of you. If you do download it, please send me the screenshot, it really helps convince the Audible execs to let me keep doing this :)
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See you next week,

Matt Ritter - aka the Friendship Guy

PS: Last week’s poll results were fascinating.​
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If you had a Friendship Portfolio Advisor, most of you would’ve been told the same thing: you need to add a few more blue-chip friends.

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